Moving in together is something that can either make or break a couple. Should you move in together? The dating and relationship experts from PortlandSingles will be able to help you better make that decision today. Get ready, as they review things you must
have in your relationship before moving in together.
Effective Communication
Just because you're moving in together doesn't mean you're tying the
knot with each other just yet, but maybe you plan on doing it down the
road. But you also must remember this
isn't just a roommate arrangement you're talking about here, states Portland
Singles, it's living together as a couple.
Everyone enjoys a little time alone, especially when you spend a lot of
time arguing and bickering with each other like any other couple does. But when you live together as a couple, you can
no longer run to your room and play your favorite music at max volume. However, what you can do, is get on the
internet, do some research, browse your Facebook, or read a good book to
distract yourself a little bit.
While you used to love being by yourself at difficult times, living
together does force you to be able to address problems head on, states Portland
Singles. It also helps you navigate
through tough waters, and solve fights and disagreements. You must both be mature enough to handle
situations like this now.
Both partners must be able to drop their guard and be open to solve any
issue that comes to hand. Otherwise,
what you thought would be a happy home, will be filled with tension, explains Portland
Singles. And tension is never healthy
for your relationship.
In all relationships, you have to be willing to hear what your partner
has to say, even if you don't agree with what he or she is saying. A lot of times swallowing your pride can be
one of the toughest things to do, especially when you've been wrong. The truth is, that everyone has different
conflict resolution styles, explains Portland Singles, and they often
clash with each other. But part of
growing as a couple is knowing which battles to pick and which ones to let go.
Financial Stability
One of the major causes of divorce in the United States is financial
problems. Many couples cannot comprehend
how important it is to be financially stable, even if they're not living
together. But those who are planning on
moving in together must have their money in order before doing it, explains Portland
Singles.
The first thing you must do before moving in together is choose an
affordable place that both of you are comfortable paying for. This means you will have to search through
many classified ads and get help from a real estate agent.
Another thing you must do is agree on the must haves in a house, such
as washer/dryer, square footage, number of bedrooms, and location. And then, come up with the things you would
each like or prefer to have, but are not a necessity, things such as the
layout, a pool, yard, gym, and being close to stores.
Sit down with your partner and figure out the exact monthly budget you
have to work with, whether you are renting or buying, suggests Portland
Singles. For many couples who have
never been on their own, this is a tough thing to do. For many people, the only time they have been
on their own was during their college years.
So it's important you both have steady incomes coming in, as you need
to figure out your monthly payments for rent/mortgage, gas/heat, food,
electricity, and many more things. And
just because you can afford it doesn't mean your partner can, reminds PortlandSingles. It might be time for your
partner to save some money or get a better paying job before you both embark on
buying or renting a house together.
Don't spend money you don't have, but never settle either. Find a place that fits both of you so you
won't have to go searching for pennies and quarters between your sofa.
Long Partnership
One of the things you must do before you move in together is decide if
your partner is the right one for you, explains Portland Singles. It is a very difficult task to move backwards
once you have moved in together. By packing
and moving in together you're choosing to become a part of one another's lives,
and on a deeper level. Moving in
together isn't just a little step, it's a huge leap, states Portland Singles.
Remember how much you enjoyed walking around the house in your
underwear, or how you are used to throwing your sweaty gym clothes on the
floor? Well, those things may not be
proper to do anymore.
How about cooking, did you always used to only have to cook for
yourself? How about watching TV, did you
like to walk in from work and lounge on the couch all night watching TV without
having anyone interrupt you? Well, those
things might become a memory of the past when you move in together, explains Portland
Singles. Of course, that's not to
say all your freedom will be gone, but all those things you did alone will
be.
A great benefit of moving in together is that you won't always have
your parents, friends, or roommates honing in on whatever you're doing, since
now you're going to be living with your partner. Now that you live together, romance will come
in without a warning, and you can enjoy all the privileges that come from
living with your partner.
It's a dream for every couple, but it's not always the most prudent
choice. Every couple would love to enjoy
a romantic getaway and be intimate together, but keep in mind that this is not
what moving in together is, explains Portland Singles. This is a major step in a long term
relationship. And although you can walk
away from living together, it will be a very difficult time. Neither of you can say you want to take a
break now, because you both live together.
So if you truly love this person and want to share your life together,
then by all means move in together and share a happy life together as a couple. But if you have any doubts in your mind, then
put moving in together on the back burner, at least for now. It is better to wait until the time is right,
rather than rush into something so major like moving in with your partner,
states Portland Singles. The
decision is yours to make, just make sure you evaluate and assess the situation
between you and your partner before making such a big decision in your
lives.
